Blowing up emotional land mines
Before getting started you may want to share this article with your partner. Not so you can fix them. But so they are aware that YOU are ready to start to blow up some of your land mines. Perhaps they may look to do the same, perhaps not. Either way, if you can blow all of yours up you’ll feel a lot freer in all areas of your life.
There are two steps:
Step 1 – Start to identify YOUR land mines.
These are the issues & topics you react to, the ones you hate discussing, and the ones that cause a negative feeling in you – whether it’s sadness, frustration, resentment, anger or another adverse reaction.
Step 2 – One by one, commit to blowing them up for good!
You may like to believe that they’ll eventually go away…. Time will heal them.
But the reality is, in gridlock, the mines are regenerating – that is, if they’re not dug up and dealt with they’ll go off again when next stepped on. And as noted in (insert a link to part 1), this means they not only still exist but they often cause new minds of resentment to be created.
Blowing them up requires you to start to open up and be prepared to work through and discuss the toughest of topics. It requires you to be ready to feel a lack of comfort for a period of time so you can have more than a superficial conversation. Not with the aim to ‘win’ and convince anyone else that they should not speak about it or that they should agree with you and then all is good, but with the aim to understand why you have such a reaction to an area of discussion. Once you understand where the response is coming from you can gradually let it go. 3 Steps to Access Your Full Potential steps-to-access-your-full-potential and The KEY to eliminating BAD HABITS! may assist you to do this.
If you find you’re getting stuck or looping – unable to let go of a negative feeling around a particular topic then be proactive – whether you’re aware of it or not, the block will be across all areas of your life so dealing with the one issue will free you up in many areas. Speak to a friend or consider a coach who can help you uncover the unconscious hooks.